APOLOGY
I was afraid to speak
for too long
and that makes sense.
Worn out, we fumbled by the light of the refrigerator.
You listened to music I couldn’t hear
until you got close to me,
your body humming with it.
I ate by myself
in the living room.
When you went for a drive
I put a sweater on
and watched the neighbor prune the garden
through the window
No one saw me
in that other life
I didn’t ask them to
It was a fog I enjoyed
and sometimes walked through
half-naked
looking for an excuse
to be lonely
IN A LOW REGISTER
Cars go by without noticing me
I wonder if you are sleeping now
The night I ran away
I made a peach cobbler
It was perfect August, and cold
on the pond where the loons live
People are always getting rid
of what’s familiar, and replacing it with someone I’ve never met.
I take a picture of the loon barely visible in the distance
And send it to Emilie, who loves me
Friendship is a soft nod at the end of each night.
When I finally emerge from the house, it is snowing,
almost a foot. My grandfather on his way to be hydrated.
Time works in short bursts, like a candle
burning out. I have to believe
The distance between two points can be traversed
At least the dream in which you hand me
some brightly colored balloons
THE RADIO WILL TELL YOU
ANYTHING YOU WANT TO HEAR
In meetings, I forget I was ever a poet
I sit in the driveway,
listening to a French meteorologist
talk about the weather in Canada.
The border is closed indefinitely, and yesterday
someone told me that bees didn’t exist in America until
we brought them over on boats
If the trees start bleeding
who will pay their premiums?
Most nights, we are too tired to make eye contact.
I sit on the toilet and try to remember how to cry.
Occasionally, I remember to look up at the world.
I cradle your head in my lap. The truth is,
I thought my money would last forever, longer
than this I thought
somehow
My money
Rebecca Valley’s work has been published in Rattle, Black Warrior Review, Tinderbox Poetry Journal, on Poets.org, and elsewhere. She received her MFA in Poetry from the University of Massachusetts Amherst, and curates writing prompts on Instagram @living_room_theatre. You can find more of her work at www.rebeccavalley.com.